Friday, July 4, 2008

The F Word


It's been long enough now and I still can't take it. This is the official statement from Camp Finley-Tharpe on the "F word."

I hate the word "fiance." I hate it hate it HATE IT. I've been engaged now for almost 8 months and still haven't "gotten used to it" and I know now that I never will. I cringe every time someone uses it to describe me. And it's gotten to the point now that I dread the moment when I have to introduce Aaron to someone new because there's a moment where I think I'll be okay saying "my fiance" and then when it comes to that moment I just freeze up. 
Take, for example, this conversation that I had recently...

John: Hey Megan, have you met Wendy?
Me: No I haven't. Hi Wendy, it's nice to meet you.
Wendy: Hi Megan, nice to meet you too.
Me: Wendy, this is my............ (pause for inner conflict)................... boyfriend, Aaron.
John: Wow, you're still fighting it, aren't you.

I know, it's terrible, I'll probably be ostracized from the bridal community for saying something so blasphemous, but I just can't bring myself to use that word. There's something so pretentious about it I can't stand it. It just that it doesn't feel like a word I'd use to describe either of us! 
And I don't want to insult anyone who is freely and happily using the terms. Good on ya mate for that! I think people should be happy to be and have a fiance. For the longest time I couldn't wait to by someone's fiance. But now that I am, I just can't bring myself to ACTUALLY use the word. Sometimes I hate myself.

But Aaron's the same way! From the moment we were engaged we talked about not wanting to use the word "fiance," but what are we to do!? There's no other word for it. He's more than a "boyfriend" but he's not a "husband" yet. It's just that "fiance" just sounds so obnoxious to us.

We've been using the term "marrying girlfriend" or "marrying boyfriend" but people haven't been that receptive to it. Well, it's more like, they look at us like we're loony-toons, which just ends up giving me the same feeling as if I've said "fiance."

So this 4th of July I'm celebrating my independence from the term "fiance." Yay for freedom! :)

Does anyone else felt the same way about the "F word"?

7 comments:

Drew said...

Possible alternatives: "My intended," "my to-be-betrothed," "Mr. Megan," "The one I caught," "The guy who's making an honest girl out of me," "The man who would have me, despite all the glaring flaws." It's a matter of preference, really.

Personally, I never liked the boy of "fiancee." The double-E at the end make the word look better, in my head.

megan said...

ooh... I like the suggestions Drew! Good idea, consider the alternatives.
Someone suggested yesterday that should introduce Aaron in a french accent as in "Zees ees ma fiance." I kinda liked that idea.

Michelle a.k.a. MOM said...

You're not alone. I always hated the F word too!

Use Drew's suggestions, or just say "My Hubby-To-Be" or future hubby or ANYTHING but the F word!

GOOD for you!

:)

megan said...

Somehow I knew you'd have my back on this Michelle!
I think I'll try "future husband" and say it all goofy-like and see how that works for me.

Michelle a.k.a. MOM said...

Only 97 days of F-word dilemma left...it'll be a non-issue before you know it!

:)

Kimmmmmmy said...

I love fiance. But maybe that's because I'm also obsessed with croissants and pommes frites.

Court Knee said...

hahaha i noticed you call him your boyfriend yesterday when you were in our apt. and i thought hmm boyfriend or fiance?
but i agree the word fiance sucks.